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Today's weirdness appeared in postings to ba.food: "Deep
Fried Snickers Bars". Or pieces thereof, or pieces of European
Mars bars, dipped in fish batter and thence to the deep fat
fryer. Source? Either Scotland or Australia. Sound revolting?
I'm not quite sure, since there's chocolate involved. I thought
"Jo-Jos" were disgusting when I first heard of them, but
they've got 'em in the Safeway Deli's "hot foods" section
so a lot of people must be buying those quartered,
dipped & deep-fat-fried potatoes.
While driving around at lunchtime, I considered ways of being more honest here - I
thought, why not use a starting point of "I hate it when..." and
then I remembered this girl in high school who told me that she
loved boys, but hated people, because they always mess things up;
and it's true: with the gender adjusted I feel the same way. I
try to be social, but when it's so obvious from square one
that the other doesn't really want to be friendly, why
bother? Why bother making the initial effort, even? I don't know;
in my case, because I'm lonely, or maybe it's just because I'm
human. I think the catalyst for this suppressed wail of anguish
is yet another repetition of a fairly common hallway behavior
pattern (at least, this happens to me all the time): I meet
someone casually at work - an unknown, from another project or department.
A connection seems to be forming out of the small talk, and names
are exchanged - then we part. Later, I pass the person in the hall,
and I say "Hi, <name>!" And they respond with just a "Hi!"
(No name? Is mine/am I that forgettable?) Repeat. And then again,
only this time I just say "Hi!" (If you won't say my name I won't
bother with yours, either!) The next time we pass in the hallway,
after eye contact I say nothing - and neither does s/he. So much
for that. Guess they see no benefit from knowing me; I should
therefore feel the same way about them, and this line of thought's
leading straight down so I may as well terminate my life right
now. L would disagree, reminding me of how I've taught him
that the positive spirituality (ie love) is in the giving, not
the reaction, and if they don't respond it's their deficiency,
not mine; they're the superficial ones, not me. I don't really
hate them, just what they do.
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