Problem Child

By Amy Chused and Charles Dickson

Page 20

  Scribonia and Jiapa are in the commander's office, sitting in 
  front of the communication console, talking to the starbase 
  Scribonia: Have you decided on who will take care of the boy 
  until Bloocheez comes to pick him up?
  Desktop Commander: (looking grim) No, our chief counselor is 
  still searching for a good foster group... (sound of something 
  breaking in the background. D.C. winces)
  Unfortunately, he made the mistake of posting the kid's 
  personality matrix data you sent over, and now nobody will touch 
  him with a ten foot pole. (Another crash. You can see D.C. 
  resisting the urge to look behind him at what it was.)
  Lite: (in background) Yeee - haaw!
  Scribonia: Has the C_Sick been spotted yet by the convoy ships?
  Desktop Commander: Oh yes. They've intercepted him on a heading 
  for *Warp One!* (D.C.'s voice breaks at the last 
  words. After a moment of recovery.) Just between you and me, 
  commander, I never thought I'd be glad to see an HVR warship 
  General laughter and merriment between Scribonia and Jiapa. Hey, 
  it wouldn't be a Star Trek episode without a cloying epilogue, 
  now would it?
  The End, with no apologies to the original authors of the Problem 
  Child movies. Ours is funnier and has fewer pee jokes.

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